Originally posted to Instagram on July 11, 2021. Edits for clarity and grammar have been made.
What is filtering?
Filtering is when you add unnecessary words to your document explicitly telling the reader what the character sees, hears, feels, and thinks. It’s the most obvious in first person POV, but it occurs in third person POV as well.
There are specific words that indicate filtering such as: noticed, saw, heard, felt, knew, wondered, believed, decided, hoped, smelled, watched, (and many, many more).
Examples of Filtering:
I see the birds flit from one branch to the other. I feel the humid, summer air wrap around me and I think about all the summers that came before this one. I hope that Grandma will be proud of what I’m doing… who I’ve become, but I don’t think she would be.
An example of filtering in the first person
He wondered about all the sorcerers that came before him—what they wanted him to be. He felt his stomach sink and the stave slip from his fingers. He heard it clatter to the ground, saw the oak wood split, and he tried to hold back a gasp and hot tears. He knew there was no going back.
An example of filtering in the third person
Here are the examples with the filtering bolded:
I see the birds flit from one branch to the other. I feel the humid, hot air wrap around me and I think about all the summers that came before this one. I hope that Grandma will be proud of what I’m doing… who I’ve become, but I don’t think she would be.
He wondered about all the sorcerers that came before him — what they wanted him to be. He felt his stomach sink and the stave slip from his fingers. He heard it clatter to the ground, saw the oak wood split, and he tried to hold back a gasp and hot tears. He knew there was no going back.
It’s super repetitive to read, right? It’s shocking how many times it crops up in those two short examples alone. Getting into other “good writing constructs”, you don’t want too many sentences starting the same way because it bores the reader (there’s more to it than that).
Now, let’s compare it without the filtering.
Birds flit from one branch to the other. Humid, hot air wraps itself around me. This is just like all the summers before: same warm yet chilled with loneliness days that never end. Hopefully Grandma will be proud of what I’m doing… who I’ve become, but she isn’t.
He wondered about all the sorcerers that came before him — what they wanted him to be. His stomach sank and the stave slipped from his fingers. It clattered to the ground, the oak wood split, and burning tears pressed against the back of his eyes. There was no going back.
I kept some filtering in the second example. Why? Because the third person is removed from the subject inherently. Generally, when it comes to thoughts/thought processes of the POV character, you can filter or place the direct thought in italics. Don’t filter actions or sensory details (there isn’t a need for it!). However, to push myself I’m going to eliminate all the filtering from the second example.
The disappointment of his predecessor sorcerers slammed down onto his shoulders and ripped the air from his lungs. What were they thinking? What were they going to do? His stomach sank and the stave slipped from his fingers. It clattered to the ground, the oak wood split, and burning tears pressed against the back of his eyes. There was no going back.
And still, the writing improves — there’s more details and a stronger sense of immediacy. Despite this being third person, we’re in his head. We feel what he feels. This dips into deep POV, which I adore.
Should filtering be used?
Like anything else in writing, it has its uses, but for the most part, ditch it. Filtering, at worst, alienates your audience and reminds them “hey, you’re not here”, and at best, it’s a drag and an eyesore. Sure, it’s grammatically correct, but it limits you as a writer. Most of the time you can cut it out and the sentence will be stronger for it.
First person POV has little to no excuses for filtering. The sentence doesn’t work without the filtering? Reevaluate the sentence. The vast majority of the time, you can cut out filtering and come up with more impactful, creative ways to convey what you need to. Removing the filtering in the first example shows me a lot of weaknesses within it, which I won’t edit for the sake of comparison. But in seeing those mistakes, I can work to make the deeper edits that need to be made in order to improve it.
Conclusion
Surface-level filtering is easy to spot and eliminate and it instantly cleans up your prose. However, there is more to filtering that’s deeper and more difficult to explain (which I’m in the process of learning about).
Want more examples and to do further research of your own? Check out Alexa Donne’s YouTube video titled “Filter Words and How to Fix This ‘Telling’ Problem”.
To be frank, I am heavily biased against filtering because it is one of my writing and reading pet peeves. Filtering annoys me because it’s such an easy fix but it clogs up a manuscript like nothing else. Once you see it, you can’t not see it.
Thank you for reading, and hopefully, you found this helpful.
J. V. Montague 